Friday, 22 May 2009

Thursday, 21 May 2009

Bloody footballers are just *so* gay....



Bet he wanted a month off with pay, too. Tart.

Monday, 18 May 2009

Eco Bollocks

I spent a dirty couple of hours on Saturday on my hands and knees wearing Marigolds, in all the way up to my elbow.
Bloody blocked drains.
We live in a basement flat of a typical 1860's Victorian 6-storey block; hence all the water drainage from the flats above feed into a couple of drains at the rear of the property. Three months ago I had to clear one of these as it was draining only very slowly, wouldn't even clear with two applications of Caustic Soda. Eventually we extracted from it a grey-white fatty plug about the size of a melon, which had a consistency somewhat like tallowfat candlewax, by forcing a whippy metal cleaning rod round the S-trap and shoving it down into the manhole downstream.
We had a similar problem on Saturday with the other drain, except this time (sorry if you've just had lunch) the blockage had more the consistency of Nivea or Flora and was a rank, fetid smelling black/grey sludge - hence the Marigolds.
Both these drains are domestic water waste, not sewerage (thank goodness) and come from a variety of sinks (bathroom and kitchen) and washing machine outlets.
In neither case did the stuff seem to have food debris in it and didn't have a foody smell so what was the culprit?
Well, having a check around a few plumbing websites it seems that the problem is being seen more and more frequently lately, and seems to be down to a couple of possible causes: the recent trend towards "Eco-friendly" low temperature washes (30 degrees and less) and "Eco-Balls". The problem being that the low temperature wash doesn't dissolve body dirt and grease and food fat, but instead just lifts it into suspension and it is then just deposited into the pipes after the washing machine, and the "Eco-Balls" are used without detergents at all and so don't even try to dissolve the fatty stuff.
It seems that many plumbers are now being called out to clear just this sort of blockage, with the attendant problem that the gunk is rank with bacteria (hence the foul smells) and the black mould being found inside washing machine door seals. Apparently most instruction manuals state somewhere that it is necessary to run a high temperature (greater than 60 degree) wash once a month to alleviate potential problems but most people are so hooked on their green credentials that they don't bother.

No reason for this post, really, apart from a bit of a rant.

Eco-Balls? Never a truer product name!

Friday, 15 May 2009

Topical Joke

The Barber
One day a florist goes to a barber for a haircut.

After the cut he asked about his bill and the barber replies,
'I cannot accept money from you. I'm doing community service this week.'
The florist was pleased and left the shop.

When the barber goes to open his shop the next morning there is a 'thank
you' card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door.

Later, a copper comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill,
the barber again replies, 'I cannot accept money from you. I'm doing
community service this week.' The copper is happy and leaves the shop.

The next morning when the barber goes to open up there is a 'thank you'
card and a dozen doughnuts waiting for him at his door.

Then, an MP comes in for a haircut , and when he goes
to pay his bill the barber again replies,
'I cannot accept money from you. I'm doing community service this week.'
The MP is very happy and leaves the shop.

The next morning when the barber goes to open up, there are a dozen
MPs lined up waiting for a free haircut.

Gordon: "I'm Loving It"

Strangely, I reckon Gordon Brown & his inner cabal are actually loving all of this.
There's not been a single mention in any of the papers or the blogs (both official and bile-full unofficial of all political colours) of the really important issue of the mis-governance of the UK that had brought him, his party and the UK to their metaphorical knees for over a fortnight now.
Classic piece of prestidigitation! I've fucked over your country but what's 200 Billion compared to 200k in a dodgy mortgage claim? WOOT!

Tuesday, 12 May 2009

Why boys need their parents - part 2 of an occasional series

Bastards.

Got a speeding tug on Sunday - doing 50 on a bit of country road with no side exits but which led out of town from a 30. Lampposts to denote 30 zone are obscured by trees and the bastXXXXcoppers were obscured by a pillar supporting the overpass. Not half a mile away is a separate but near identical bit of country road that I go along every morning where the limit *IS* 50, but it even goes past a fucking Nursery school fer Christ's sake! No logic except the bit I was nicked on has some nice shady hiding places.

Gits.

Friday, 8 May 2009

Boys need their parents- an occasional series - Part 1


In honour of Obnoxio's inestimable partworks, here's the beginning of one of my own.